I Told You So

During our last family car ride:

Me: "Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O.  And on that farm he had a-"

Emerson: "Daddy!"

Me: "E-I-E-I-O, with a-"

Emerson: "No no, here!!!"

We had been through all the animals on the farm at that point, so Emerson looked around the car for an idea, saw Ryan in the driver's seat, and decided to incorporate him into the song.  HAHA!  She knows that Daddy means business.

Easter is one of my favorite times of the year.  You get to break out the white pants and colorful clothing again, stores are filled with themed candy (I'll use that excuse any day), and holiday themed kids' clothes are displayed in every ad on my computer.

BUY ME!

So let's dive right into all things Spring.

In addition to the beautiful weather it's a special time for my family to celebrate the Birthdays of three awesome people: my Mom, Dad, and grandmother.

They chose Ruby Tuesday's for the Birthday lunch, but what we didn't realize is that this particular one was under a major renovation.

Nothing says "Happy Birthday" like a guy zooming by our window every five minutes in a Genie.

"Haul 'em in, boys.  Are these bricks, or croutons?"

Nonetheless, we still enjoyed a most hilarious lunch.  The waitress made the mistake of asking my grandparents if they wanted an appetizer.  Fifteen minutes later after discussing the portion size, consistency, and price of each dish, they decided on cheese fries. But just before our waitress walked away to put in the order my grandmother second guessed herself.

"Wait, cheese fries aren't french fries, are they???"

And in other news, I want to order a corn dog, but just so we're clear...that's not a hot dog, right?!

Our family outings are that of an "I Love Lucy" episode.

Spring is also a time to welcome new babies!  Jaime is due in just a few weeks, and she is one of three friends right now who has decided to wait until the baby is born to find out the gender.

Kudos to them!  I can't wait to open a pack of Starbursts I just bought; much less wait nine months to find out whether my child is a boy or girl.  That takes a special kind of patience that I do not possess.  But I can hardly wait to meet these little ones!

A few weeks ago Emerson and I had been running errands for about two hours.  She was at her limit with patience, and I knew her carriage was about to turn into a pumpkin.  Quickly.

So I did what any normal parent would do.  I spotted a plastic bag of Easter eggs and gave her the package....but she wasn't satisfied until we opened it.

Now I've always thought it was silly to see people eating out of a package in the grocery store before paying.  It's just not something you do.  But since all the checkout lanes were completely full, this was my effort to keep her quiet- and keep all those around us at peace.

So, one by one she opened all 48 eggs at the counter.

I don't know what it is, but her obsession with eggs is at an all-time high.

For a few nights, she wouldn't even sleep unless the basket was in her bed.

Eggs-cellent dreams

So when we came home on Good Friday, I thought it was only appropriate to hide eggs around my parents' house and have our own little hunt.

It was a hit!

Wait until she grows up and realizes that looking for things isn't all it's cracked up to be...literally.  I hunt every day for my keys, phone, wallet, you name it.  And there is no "prize egg" in my house, unless you count the $20 bill I found in last year's winter coat.  

Easter Sunday was extra sweet.  Emerson opened every piece of chocolate in those eggs and handed them out.  

#SharingisCaring

It's always wonderful to celebrate with packed pews for Easter.  People all over the world flock to church that day.  Although, we need to be spiritually fed EVERY Sunday.  I'll just leave this right here.

The scripture, message, and music are just as important the other 51 weeks of the year!

After church came one of the year's highlights: an Easter egg hunt and get together at the Coleman home.

First up, Emerson met Bentley, a teacup Yorkie that is to-die-for cute.  I could see a look of sincere interest in Ryan's eyes as Aunt Jenny gave her sales pitch on why these dogs are a must have.

I saw the wheels spinning in Ryan's head as she was talking until he asked the usual deal-breaker question: "How much does it cost?"

Well, that dream stopped in its tracks.  Maybe one day.

Our next activity was egg dyeing!  Here is a friendly spelling reminder:

Emerson loved it!  She also hates getting her hands dirty, so fortunately her outfit remained in tact.

Then it was time to find the eggs!  

And soon enough Poppy Peter Cottontail himself hopped on over!  Despite the humidity and scattered showers, it was a perfect day.

This has become one of my favorite traditions.  Here is a look back at the past three Easters...

2016

2015

2014

Like Christmas, Easter can be overly commercialized.  It's easy to forget that in spite of all the fun, candy, and parties, we are celebrating the resurrection of Jesus who died an excruciating death for US.  I recently came across an article detailing a scientific explanation of what Jesus endured while on the cross.  If you've never read it, you HAVE TO.  You have to understand the magnitude of the agony He suffered and didn't deserve: How Jesus Died For You.

God sent His Son in place of you, your neighbor, that annoying coworker, the homeless man on the corner, the politicians, the old and the young...  We are all sinners just the same.  

I would have LOVED to see the look on the guards' faces when they saw that the stone was rolled away from the tomb, and Jesus's clothes were neatly folded in the corner.  It's the greatest "I Told You So" in history. 

Sure, Jesus could have stopped those who were beating Him, cursing His name, and mocking Him.  But He knew it was part of a plan, and He was waiting to do it the right way.

It is so easy to say that we're followers of Jesus and claim to be Christians.  I could also claim to be a mathematician.

"You mean Common Core isn't about apples?!"

But as a body of Christ sometimes we need to DO more and say less.  The way we live, the things we do and don't do are all indicators of the heart.  So just like the scars of Jesus were proof that He was King, let your actions and life be your way of saying "I told you so" regarding your faith.

Howl About That?

Busy; adjective.  Definition = having a great deal to do.

That pretty much sums my life lately.  To put it in perspective: if I had a Fitbit, my step count would surpass those of all the ants in this pile.

So we decided that it was time for a break, and I wanted to do something totally different.

The Great Wolf Lodge seemed like just the place to go.

This is a total vacation-fun zone from the moment you walk in the door.  It's got an indoor water park, arcade, restaurants, gift shops, you name it- that you can access without ever setting foot outside.  AND you can save $100 per night by simply going during the week. 

Upon arriving we were greeted with a stone fireplace and deer chandeliers; this place was right up Ryan's alley.

No, Mr. Moody, those are not for sale.

Although, I'm sure the thought crossed his mind.

Hmmm...

There was even a storybook corner with characters that came to life.

And they had exhibits made entirely of CANDY.

It really was such a neat place.  You can go anytime of the year, because the temperature of building stays around 80 degrees 24/7.  

Emerson has always loved water, but this place?  This was her Heaven. 

To her, this was like entering the Banana Room on Donkey Kong.

"YES, LAWD!"

This park is truly awesome.  From the wave pool and slides to the toddler area and dump zones, there is truly something for all ages.

Speaking of dump zones...I was walking around when we first arrived trying to show Emerson some things she could do.  Then I saw this awesome, constructed area of shooting water.  Not many people were over there.  "Why not?" I wondered.

About five seconds later I found out the answer to that question when the bucket at the top of this apparatus dumped a tidal wave of water on me.  Turns out, the bucket is on a timer and dumps every five minutes.

This approach might be really effective for a CEO conducting an interview that he knows is going nowhere.

You have five minutes to impress me, or you get "the bucket."

Seriously.  Every square foot of that place is a land mine of water.  There are random hoses and spray sections around every corner that are just waiting for you to walk by...

"Wait, what was that?"

"That tickles, Mama!"

"Alright, it was cute the first time.  Now it's just getting ridiculous."

There's a reason that I'm in very few pictures from our family trip.  I spent most of my time chasing my two year old, being pelted with water, and taking turns with Ryan on the big slides.  I bared a striking resemblance to this cat.

In hindsight I should be embarrassed that Emerson recognized me at all during our stay.

Mr. and Mrs. Moody, your room is available for check-in.

But we were at a water park, after all, and not a fashion show.  And this place was too cool.  You didn't even have to carry around a wallet or money!  They simply scanned our bracelets every time we wanted to buy something...which got me thinking.

WHY has no one invented a scan bracelet for the Mall of America?!?!

"Katharine, your bracelet is on fire."

#TurntUp

#ShopDropAndRoll

Food for thought.  Emerson is quite the daredevil, just like I am.  Fortunately her three foot stance keeps her from the extremely dangerous rides, but she still pushes the limit.  I stood in line with her for this big orange side, expecting her to ride in my lap.

When it was our turn I was informed that this was for single riders only (no lap riding allowed)...but she didn't mind.  We strapped on her life jacket, and she flew around those turns faster than that time I accidentally dropped my ring in the sink.

I couldn't believe I let her do that.  I watched in disbelief as she twisted her body around and ended up headfirst and backwards.

But when I reached the bottom and saw her, she proclaimed, "Mommy! Do it AGAIN!"  And thus came several more rides down the orange slide.

At our 6:00 pm dinner she fell asleep while eating her kids meal.  We thought for sure she was down for the night.  

But while waiting for our check I took her to the windows that overlooked the water park, and her energy tank was suddenly refilled.

"We go SLIDE, Mommy?!?!"

 Back we went for more twists and turns until the park closed at 9:00 pm.

We were so exhausted by the time we got back to our room that we piled in the bed and were out like lights in a matter of minutes.

That was until 11:30 that evening when we were startled awake by blood curdling alarm.  I woke up to find Ryan standing on the bed trying to take the smoke alarm off the wall, thinking the batteries in it were low.

I called the front desk.  No answer.  I heard shuffling outside and opened the door into the hallway.  Granted, Ryan kept it so cold in our room that the sudden temperature change made it seem perfectly feasible that there was a fire billowing right outside of our door.

People were scurrying around with infants and kids of all ages, all of us were half dressed, and Ryan couldn't see without his contacts...in the mean time that fire alarm was so loud I think it woke up Mother Teresa.

So there we were outside in the cold with many other families wondering what in tarnation (there's a good Southern adjective) was going on.

One lady told us a hilarious story of her husband dissecting the alarm clock in their room thinking it was the culprit behind the noise.  She hoped they wouldn't be charged for it.  No one knew what was going on, but there were fire trucks and ambulances galore.

Soon enough we were all herded like cattle back inside once the alarm was off- still with no explanation- but at least we could get back in our beds.  The moment we turned off the light another deafening beep came over the speaker.  We had a speaker in our room?!

"WE DO NOT KNOW THE CAUSE OF THE ALARM.  STANDBY FOR MORE INFORMATION!!!!!"  

Fiery furnace or not I was dead tired, so this we stood by, alright.  It was just with our eyes closed while unconscious.

Long story short, we think some kid played a prank.  A kid who will likely be grounded until the end of time.

Chaos aside, I woke up to the sweetest smile the next morning. 

The second day we slowed down just enough for the important things in life...like snacks and ICEEs.

And of course I wanted to ride the most outrageous ride there, the Howlin' Tornado.  This six story slide is so massive that it doesn't even fit inside the building.

I hadn't really considered the logistics of this, but I got in line with a mother and her two kids, who oddly enough went for the front of the raft.  Now I know why; they didn't want to be the unfortunate souls going backwards.  

I was hanging on for dear life when I saw it: the drop, which led to this round-a-bout whirlwind of amusement.

I was flailing about like a string of toilet paper attached to a fan.

But I survived, LOVED it, and went several more times.  Ryan actually fell out at the end when he rode it.

Our vacation was a major success and a much needed break.  We had a picture perfect time.

That Saturday was super busy.  I had fun catching up with Kate & Megan at Lorrie's baby shower.

And that night I got to celebrate Courtney's engagement with the awesome Jordan family and many friends.  It was so much fun!

But sadly all good things must come to an end.  That Monday I woke up with a horrendous stomach bug.  I'm talking write-up-the-will bad.  And my whole body ached.  So I and many others in whom I confided were convinced that I had the flu and needed to be quarantined.

Every hair on my head hurt, and my arms, back, and legs felt like I had been hit repeatedly with a mallet.  I was so sleepy but couldn't get any rest, because I kept moving around to soothe my aching limbs.

How can I put into words exactly how this felt?  

There is a Japanese squid entree known as the "live" dish.  Its head is severed, but the muscles still work, so when you pour liquid over it all the tentacles move in a jolted, frightening, unpleasant fashion.  That is a precise representation of what I experienced.

Thank goodness my parents took care of me and my father-in-law rode all over town to find me an ICEE.

When I finally emerged from the bedroom later that evening, my sweet girl crawled in my lap.  I looked like I had driven a Corvette through a cyclone, but she smiled sweetly and said, "I like your hair, Mommy."

"Emerson, what do you mean?!  It's a mess!"

"Yes, Mommy, like a birds' nest."

Best. Compliment. Ever.