Odds are that you see these signs all the time, but what you don't see is the process behind them. The potential agony. The WORK. All for that one little word.
These signs are the result of extreme effort by all parties.
These signs are the result of extreme effort by all parties.
By show of hands, who hates waiting?
I'm raising mine, by the way. I don't have ten seconds of patience at a red light, much less anything longer.
But after 13 months on the market our house FINALLY sold. It was like waiting for the apocalypse.
Whether it's catching a glass vase that your kid knocked over before it crashed to the ground...
The alarm waking you up minutes before your final exam in college....
Or making the winning touchdown of a national championship game with one second remaining.
We can all agree on one thing: timing matters. And showing after showing, month after month, I would wonder WHEN things were going to progress. But as a follower of Jesus I knew deep down that it wouldn't just take the right price or the right buyers...it boiled down to when and where He wanted us. And only He knew that part of the story.
We closed on our new home on my dear friend, Dorothy's, Birthday! And so, the last few weeks of our lives have been absolute chaos. Coordinating installations, unpacking boxes, trying to survive the day in and day out tasks while getting an entire house in order, making numerous trips to Lowe's and Home Depot, you name it.
This is our happy ending. Or shall I say beginning.
But now we'll go behind the scenes. What events led us here? How did we decide on this house? As usual, it's a story...
At the beginning of last year our old house went on the market.
Remember that we had just found out that we were expecting baby #2, so in my mind I was questioning the timing of this but reasoned with a couple of key points: Would it be easier to move in late pregnancy? No. Would it be easier to move once the baby is here? Most definitely no. As with most things in life, it's best not to procrastinate.
Tell my ninth grade self that, but I digress.
We all experience our daily form of difficulty, but I never anticipated the level of aggravation that was keeping a house in order with a (then) three year old.
Are. you. kidding?!?
Then came a phrase that I would learn to despise with every ounce of my being.
"Show clean."
This meant that not ONLY did everything have to be spotless, but show clean is another level of Hades. It means that all the items you actually use everyday, like hairbrushes, toothpaste, your mail, etc. Basically anything that you need will be placed out of sight. So I prefaced every question with "Have you seen such-and-such?" for what seemed like an eternity. It was beyond frustrating, especially for someone who works from home.
How to make Katharine angry 101: the following are actual events that transpired while having our house on the market.
1) Agents would call with extremely short notice; one gave me five minutes. But when you're at their mercy, you make it happen.
2) The emailed "feedback" we would get from potential buyers, one of whom had the audacity to say that they didn't like the house because our decor was not their style. Pardon me while I punch the nearest wall and regain composure. First of all, the decor isn't coming with the house, moron.
Second, let me put this in perspective. Let's say I go into the nearest Lowe's and ask to see this LG refrigerator.
After a thorough demonstration from the sales representative I'm going to refuse to purchase the appliance because I don't like the food that's inside of it.
Do you see how ridiculous that is? The food isn't coming with the refrig...just nevermind.
3). My most personal favorite of all: the canceled showing. There were many mornings when I had a meeting and had to get one OR TWO kids ready for daycare while leaving the house spotless before pulling out of the driveway. I'd have to hop out of bed in cleaning mode while trying to remember every single item I needed that day, because I couldn't come back to get it.
Those mornings would be gut wrenching, making me late almost constantly, only to find out that the buyers either didn't make it or decided not to come at all.
And every time I turned around people would tell me that their house sold in a few weeks, days, or even HOURS. And I would smile while starting to profusely sweat.
Then there were the countless calls from other realtors asking questions and wanting us to work with them, discussions about price negotiation, coming out of pocket for what seemed like endless home projects....you name it. It costs a ton of money to sell a house.
To say that I was bitter after over a year on the market was an understatement. Although, I did remember how much I adored my neighborhood and neighbors and focused on the convenience of everything around me (stores, etc).
So many times I would pray, "God...WHERE do you want us?!? And WHEN will we move?" And it's as if I heard His voice like a ton of bricks a few months ago, "I will work it out for you."
And so as much as was humanly possible I stopped letting it bother me. Right after Christmas I would tackle a room or closet every week so that when the house did finally sell it would make it easier on us to move. I got rid of and gave away lots of stuff. This was all preparing me for a text right around Valentine's Day... "We got the offer."
Say what?!?
I was in a late meeting that afternoon and was dying to call Ryan but didn't get to talk with him until about an hour later, which seemed like forever. Within a day we had successfully come to an agreement on the selling price and closing costs, but there was one minor detail that needed to be worked out.
We had 30 days to find a new place to live.
On your mark. Get set...
The Search
For the next several nights we both stayed up very late researching Zillow and tons of other sites with available homes. Our realtor also sent us a few to choose between. We even toyed with building, but with our tight time frame we ultimately decided that we'd get the most for our money- and quickly- with an existing house.
We had about 4-5 we really wanted to see, and due to our schedules we had to look at most of them separately. And I learned a really important lesson about square feet. That was initially the first piece of information I looked for, until I realized that it has everything to do with smart use of space. We looked at one home that was considerably larger but had all these areas and hallways of useless space. It's kind of like realizing that we all have 24 hours in a day. Some of us can waste that time or spend it wisely.
But back to the house search.
Then came "the one." We both LOVED it, the landscaping was immaculate, the curb appeal was just gorgeous, it had a huge yard, and the neighborhood was phenomenal. Because the neighborhood is just as important as the house. We had our minds made up and were going to make an offer the next day.
The sellers already had an inspection report, so late that evening we received a copy of it via email. And our hearts were subsequently crushed. It was a 45 page document detailing things like water damage, etc. Ryan freaked out. In fact, he was so caught off guard while reading that he actually started to feel sick and got up around midnight to get something to drink.
The Irony
As he started down the stairs he noticed a strange smell. I had left a pot of boiling water on the stove to make Landon's bottles. In my haste, I had left it on high. All the water had evaporated, and for all we know this could have ended disastrously. So let this sink in for a second: the damage at the house we wanted potentially saved our existing home. Isn't that nuts??
I was heartbroken, but there was a ray of hope. My realtor had taken me to see one final house after "the one." Although my mind was already made up, from the moment I stepped in what is now our new home I was completely enthralled.
"Ryan, when I walked in that house, I said...crap." This turned out to be a very important quote in our home buying process. Every turn and new detail I discovered about our new house served as further affirmation that this was a better fit for us and had so many more features than the other one had. It made my decision extremely difficult. But once we read that inspection report I knew without question: THIS was it.
The Offer
We negotiated with the sellers, but little did I know just HOW many details had to be resolved. There's a reason why the buying and selling process has its own TV show. There were more calls from mortgage companies, pest control, inspectors, HVAC folks, oh my goodness. I don't know how anyone in real estate has any hair left.
But we finally came to an agreement and got all the details sorted out. There was just one major, insurmountable burden left...
The Move
They say to be careful what you wish for, right? And not to complain? Because all along I thought that simply having the house show clean was agony. This was nothing compared to moving everything out of our house with just a few weeks to spare.
I'm going to introduce you to the President and Vice President of the newest local company...
"Two Grandparents and a Van"
In usual fashion my parents dropped everything to come and help us pack the house. We started with just the Christmas decorations. This picture is only the beginning. Doesn't it give you major anxiety?!
Look around your house and the room you're sitting in right now. Imagine that everything had to go. All those items over the years that you thought you'd use one day, the late night junk you bought on QVC because the lady was very convincing at 4:00 am, the clothes you still think you might be able to wear, the toys, junk drawers, papers, important documents, things in cabinets....It is an absolutely infinite task.
And just when you think you're through you discover a hidden area that's still packed full. Without question moving is one of the hardest things I've done in my life.
And all the while you have to keep out items that you need during the transition, so then you have the I'll-need-this-before-we-leave pile, the kids-must-haves-pile, which must gradually be whittled away. Nothing is where you need it when you need it. My blood pressure is boiling again just writing this.
Due to a gap between closings we had to move all of our stuff TWICE. You heard that correctly. And so, we became best pals with the people at a local storage facility. Ryan didn't think we needed any help; we were going to do it all ourselves. I reminded him that there is a reason for professional moving companies, but my suggestion sat in the box untouched.
Where was the logic? What kind of work did he think the two of us - alone- could handle?!
"All of you, head home! We'll will take it from here."
Change every linen in this hotel during lunch hour? "We've got this!"
I need a t-shirt for what we survived during the next few weeks. Ryan did enlist the help of one of his work buddies with the big ticket items like our beds, couches, and the washer/dryer.
A TON of the other stuff- like all those killer odds and ends- were boxed up and hauled by yours truly and my parents. It was such a chore.
And moving with so much kid stuff?!? Where did it all come from? When I was little I walked around with a box of Cheerios for fun, but kids these days require all kinds of stimulating toys.
These items hardly fit neatly in boxes. It was like trying to cram tools into a bottle. NOT the best fit.
You wanna put those WHERE?!
...My face when we arrived to the storage unit at 8:30 the first evening to find out that the entrance key they provided didn't work.
But at least we did have some fun downtimes, like celebrating Poppy's Birthday.
Reading to each other on air mattresses once our furniture was gone.
And of course...what's a Carlson get together without books and games?
Presenting our newest recruits: the Tiny Tot movers.
We worked like rented mules and were thus absolutely exhausted in every sense of the word. These grandparents deserve THE GREATEST medal one can give.
And so, we ended up with FOUR of these units- completely packed to the max. It definitely puts everything in perspective. We've all heard the saying, "You can't take it with you when you die." And as precious as many of these items are to us they're still ultimately just things.
No matter what you have in life, someone will always have something nicer, whether it's car, boat, job, or anything else. To Paris Hilton my house is probably the size of a closet. It's a good rule of thumb to be thankful for what you do have, because someone somewhere would be grateful for it, too.
And so on the last evening in our precious home I reflected on many times. This was such a special house. It was a legend.
In April of 2011 I had all of my bridesmaids over to kick off my Bachelorette weekend. We played all kinds of games and made dresses out of toilet paper. My friends really hosted an incredible weekend for me.
It was the house Ryan and I came home to when we got married.
It was the place where we brought our precious baby girl and boy home from the hospital.
Do I even need to mention that I LOVE to entertain?! For Halloween, Christmas, the Oscars, and everything else in between I hosted tons of parties.
And so as my mother took one last sweep in the garage that final evening I was flooded with sentimental thoughts about this home.
It kept us safe, we had so many memories there, and I was going to miss it so much. I remember being snowed in with my family and sliding on cookie sheets down the front of the road. Emerson took some of her first steps in that family room. It was also the last place that my Dad's side of the family gathered before Papa left us. So many precious times took place at that wonderful house.
Everything flashes before you, and despite all the hassle of moving, the arguing, and the stress, you open your eyes and see emptiness. All of those memories will now exist in your mind.
This is the last photo taken of the children before we headed out the door. It seems like everything new always happens in March. I got my first job out of college, found out I was pregnant with Emerson in March, started my GCU job in March, bought a car on St Patrick's Day last year, and this year we closed on two homes. How crazy is that?!?
Our closing and move-in day were a little bit out of the ordinary. We stayed with my parents for the five days in between, and I couldn't have been happier to have *technically* been a Dillon resident for those few days. I get asked all the time whether or not we'll move back. And the truth is that I would have moved there in a heartbeat. I prayed and prayed about it. God knew that we both had good jobs where we were, we prayed about the eventual schools of the children, their future circles of friends...you name it, and we prayed about it. I wanted so much to go "home" permanently. And the stars just didn't align for us to go back.
I refuse to say that God had "better" plans for us. Because you could have offered me any city ever, and I wouldn't have traded the Birthday parties at McDonalds, the Drama program with Mrs. Teresa, the JV Martin dance recitals or East field days- any of it- for anything. I had one of the best childhoods I could imagine in Dillon.
Instead I'll say that God simply had different plans for us. Not necessarily better; just different. I still want to go back to there any possible opportunity we get. It's a debilitating feeling some days, but time can do a lot to a heart. Never say never.
That being said- let me sum up our move with a few key facts.
Imagine the bittersweet relief when I found out that our closing would not coincide with the funeral. In a wise turn of events, Ryan decided to - what's that, folks? - HIRE A MOVING COMPANY to help with the second move. He agreed that I needed to be there for the Freels and would take on all the responsibility of helping the movers place items and furniture. I left for Dillon while two 24 foot trucks were moving almost everything we own, and although I was nervous about it (would Ryan know where everything goes?) - I knew without question that I had made the right decision.
And so - with paint still on my hands - I was able to leave and provide music for Garrett's service. It was one of the most inspiring services of which I've ever been a part. So touching. Whenever you have a free moment please put the Freel family in your prayer journal and lift them up every opportunity you get. Katie told me that they are "grace sponges." May we be a community that never stops showing them that grace as we lift them up to the One who gives it in abundance.
Work Work Work Work Work
I can't help but to think that this Rhianna song was about us. The very first things we did were set up Landon's crib and paint Emerson's room. For months she has said that she wanted a purple room. I listened to her request and got a beautiful, light lavender color. She was so happy when she saw it for the first time. Decorating her bedroom is one of my last major projects in the house, and she has high expectations of me, so I better make it good. For now, it's a beautiful- and empty- lavender room.
Want to make me misty eyed? The above photo shows Jay and Ryan painting her nursery in the old house; the bottom photo is Ryan painting her big girl room at four.
Both sets of our parents came up over the next few days, and Ryan's Dad helped with things like the washer/dryer installation and trampoline, while his Mom helped me with things like unpacking china, which is tedious. In usual fashion Ryan was in head honcho mode and expected every last box to be unpacked by day two.
I later joked that if Ryan had been here during creation he would have been tapping his foot on day two...
"WHERE ARE THE ANIMALS, GOD??!"
"Well, I'm working on the ocean right now. And the land has to come before the animals."
"UNACCEPTABLE!"
I still love you, Ryan.
It was extremely chaotic, there were moments of high tension, and the kids' very first morning in the new house also happened to be school picture day...
"WHERE'S THE BOX OF EMERSON'S CLOTHES?!? SHE ONLY HAS ONE SHOE! ARE LANDON'S SOCKS UNPACKED YET?!"
But sometimes you just throw together what you can and hope for the best.
And getting used to the new house is like stepping into the year 2057. There are more gadgets and gizmos than I can imagine. The previous owners had all cable and satellite boxes routed to a closet so they wouldn't be visible, there is a tankless water heater which makes it impossible to run out of hot water, because it heats as it runs. There was not a single item on the floor of their garage, because they had a track and hook system with everything- including bikes, yard tools, and beach gear- hung up precisely and neatly. The first time I used the dish washer I thought it was broken, because it's a silence model that makes no noise. Each day I feel a little more foolish.
But that's nothing new...
But I always say it could be worse; we could have moved in August in the blistering heat.
So that's the story in a box nutshell. Did I almost forget something? Oh, yes...the grand finale. The brand new house! What made us decide on it, and what makes it unique?
Step on the welcome mat and come on in.
I'm a detail queen, and one of the first things I noticed was that every nook, every corner, and every possible area of this house had some kind of special touch. It screamed character and was totally outside of the norm.
Take the pineapples built into the rocks on the front porch for example. Pretty cool, right?!
Obviously, many of the next pictures are from before we moved in the house. It will take a while to get things fully together, but we're slowly but surely getting there.
I was greeted by a gorgeous staircase that wraps up and all the way around into the great room. This means that during Christmas I can go garland crazy!!! And I loved the iron.
It has a ton of customization and built ins. I grew up with lots of built-in shelving and really appreciate its value and the many uses it has.
I would have a bird's eye view of the children to make sure everyone is safe and calm.
I also adored the dining room and the coffered ceiling that I decided years ago would be called "the waffle."
The kitchen has a lot of counter and cabinet space, which we definitely need, and it has tons of gadgets, a built in lazy susan, and two pantries, which is excellent for organizing items like bottles, baby food, medicine, etc.
For the person who doesn't care anything about wine I have a place to store all of my serving/party platters and am making this into an organizational/mail nook.
The master suite. I loved it! Ryan is a man of few requests, and the number one make-or-break item on his list was having a master bedroom downstairs.
I also loved every detail in the bathroom. A bonus is that it has lots of space for my makeup, and most days I need all the help I can get.
It has an awesome bathtub and shower.
And look! More details. Built in turtles. I told Emerson they'd bite her feet if she didn't do what I said.
And then....the customized closet. I may have gasped a little when I saw all the room. The pictures don't really do it justice.
Also on the main floor is a private guest suite, which is great for our parents. There is a separate hallway that leads to that room, along with a full bath. Now we can have all the in-laws stay at once! Hold your cartwheel, Ryan.
The guest bedroom has a built in office desk and shelves! Perfect for a home office.
There is a large sink in the laundry room, which will be used to clean up my inevitable mess.
The kids rooms were awesome, too. The original owners also had a girl and a boy. It was absolutely the perfect set-up.
And there was another fantastic closet for a little boy!
The girl bedroom was awesome, too.
And they had the most precious jack and jill bath, which will be such a help in organizing all of the bath toys and keeping their stuff separate.
I have since found a precious shower curtain and set from one of my personal favorite stores- Bed, Bath, & Beyond.
How cute is that?
And the fantastic FROG with a built-in entertainment center will make an awesome 2nd guest room/getaway/play area for the kids.
One thing that REALLY got my attention were the four attics/storage areas in the house. I had a massive amount of attic space growing up, and it's so nice to be able to walk the Christmas trees, etc. through a door. One attic is strictly for Christmas decorations, one is for house supplies and other decorations/out of season clothes (that can be hung up!), one is for toys, and the other is for crafts and miscellaneous items. This is one of the four areas.
What else could they have possibly done to this house to make it the perfect fit for us? All it took was one step on the back porch to find out.
There is an incredible screened porch with a TV hookup and shades that go all the way around. There is room for a hammock swing and deck furniture/tables.
It also already had a swingset and sandbox that came with the house!
And...the icing on the cake....an amazing outdoor kitchen with two built in grills, storage, seating area, and a sink.
My heart literally sank when I walked outside and saw this house, because it was changing my mind, and I thought for sure I had my mind made up. So in life when you think you know what you want, trust the fact that in many cases, something better is right around the corner.
Our realtor was FABULOUS. This would not have been possible without her and her husband. He knows a ton about the construction of homes, and they connections they have are just unreal. They guided us on everything. They're two of the best people at what they do.
I've always heard people say "congratulations" on a new house, and to be quite honest I never understood why. If I were congratulated on every Belk purchase I'd be in a constant state of gratitude.
But now I get it...there are a MILLION hurdles and obstacles to overcome. So many things to coordinate, and so much hair to pull out.
So now anytime I see someone putting a "for sale" sign in their yard or looking at houses I'm going to give them my condolences.
Right next to the Birthday card store displays shouldn't there be a section of empathetic cards for fellow movers? Here's a special cheer to anyone who has ever sold or bought a home. We're in an exclusive club that knows the struggle and agony.
For hopefully many years we'll be spared of that again, until the day when a phone call comes from one of the children.
"Can you help me move into my college dorm?"
"I think I might be in FIJI that weekend...."
