Brush vs. Flush

After finding and catching a cricket in our kitchen:
Me: "AHH!!  Ryan, get that thing away from me and throw it outside."
Ryan: "Ok, but now an animal is going to eat him."
Me: "Well, he can't survive in here!"
Ryan: "Oh really? Do you see all the crumbs on our floor?  He'd live for a week!"

Cleaning police chief.

If looks could kill.

Sweet Ryan.  He came out of the womb cleaning and keeping things neat and orderly.  Don't believe me?

Baby's first words:  Tide, mop, & broom.

We were recently discussing getting a sound machine for our baby girl to help her sleep at night once she arrives.  You know, one of the ones with a babbling brook or chirping birds.  It then dawned on me that if I were to get a soothing sound machine for Ryan it would include the following settings:

1) Vacuum cleaning

2) Windex spraying

3) Dishwasher running

4) Dusting of the blinds

5) Floor scrubbing

Take that, Brookstone.

While we're on the subject of cleanliness our recent category game required us to list hygiene items starting with "L," and I put limes.

Daddy: "LIMES?!?"

Me arguing my point: "Yeah, you know, like at those spas."

Daddy: "Those are CUCUMBERS, not LIMES.  Do you know painful it would be to get lime juice in your eye???"

This message just in from the Soothing Spa: Free facials if you can withstand the citrus juice.  Safety glasses recommended.

As a disclaimer, yes I know that those are cucumbers, but I was hoping my answer would fly anyway.  Apparently Daddy is more knowledgable about spa treatments than I thought.

Limes, cucumbers, let's not get too caught up in the details...

This girl is on fireeeeeeeee.

This past Saturday Ryan's aunts and cousins hosted a wonderful family shower for me.  I love these people so dearly, and they have gone above and beyond for us!!!

Doesn't every girl need a pair of sparkly red shoes???  If only transporting to another location were as easy as clicking my heels together I'd wear a pair to work every single day.

Among the special gifts I received was this amazingly FABULOUS princess basket from the one and only Sue Darmon.  This lady's talent and skills never cease to amaze me.  She's incredible!

While eyeing all of the wonderful items and taking them out one at a time I said enthusiastically, "Oh! Bibs, hangers, and a toilet brush!!!  Thank you so much!"

What I didn't realize is that the item in my hand was actually a bottle brush, sending the entire room erupting in laughter.

And I secretly wondered how it was going to remain pink and white...

But come on, these items DO look almost identical, right???

For the sake of your child, just don't confuse the two.

 Hostess gift signs.  At least my painting is slightly more legible than my handwriting.

That night we had a cookout at the Moody grandparents' house!

I can hardly believe that I'm almost eight months pregnant, but the annoying sympathetic stares from everyone is starting to make the reality sink in.  You should see me trying to get out of the bed in the morning from our "memory foam" mattress that I insisted was the best choice.  You sink right in, alright.  The problem is trying to get out of it.

For the record a tilted bedding feature would be really convenient right now.  Why hasn't someone invented this?

"Rock-a-bye, Katharine, in the dump truck..."

In light of my condition my tolerance of life's everyday irritants has gone out the window.

Things I'm absolutely sick of:

1) Bills.  The outrageous, hurts-to-write-the-check kind of bills.

2) CONSTANT catastrophic emails and irate voicemails each day.

Just make it stop!!!

3) Rushing to the office every morning as if the world will stop spinning on its axis if I arrive at 8:01.

4) People who park in the 'expectant mothers' spot at Bi-Lo simply because they're lazy.

5) Miley Cyrus's tongue.

And while we're at it, the rest of her, too.

Everybody in America seems to have an opinion about Miley lately and her twerking that is simply not working.  Here's my take:  Yes, she is a performer, and yes, she's putting on a show.  But that doesn't mean that your tact and class should to go out the window while doing so.  She needs to realize that she is influencing millions of kids of all ages who look up to her and watch her every move.  And I speak for my generation when I say that I do not want my future nursing home caregivers to be doing this when I ask for a warm cup of tea:

So, Miley, get it together.  And quit achy breaking the hearts of parents across the world.

I just need a vacation.  I recently asked Ryan where we could go for our "baby moon" before our little girl enters the world.  His suggestion?

He is absolutely hilarious.  While this isn't the fabulous destination I had in mind it is certainly the cheaper option, and who doesn't love fried chicken?

I leave you tonight with a request.  A beloved and dear friend of our family is fighting a tough battle with cancer.  It is heartbreaking for everyone who knows her, and I ask that you take a moment to beg our Lord to heal her if it's in His will, keep her comfortable in the mean time, and wrap His arms around her family while giving them a peace they couldn't have imagined.

Family is so important, so hold your loved ones closely, because you never know what tomorrow holds.

We don't choose our family members; He did.  So remember that when you inevitably get on each others' nerves and focus on the positives, love, and FUN instead.

Seeing life through lime colored glasses,

Good Guys & Goodbyes

While riding in the car with my dear cousin and admiring the many charms on her bracelet:

Me: "Belva Jinks, I just love your sail boats!"
BJ: "My what?  Those are justice scales...."

HAHAHA!!!  Please tell me I'm not the only one who sees a striking resemblance between these two objects.

Next time you see a lawyer be sure and thank them for sailing away into justice.  I have laughed and laughed about that.

That's the thing about life.  You've just gotta keep laughing, because the moment you stop...where's the fun in that?  Each and every day brings different triumphs and train wrecks, but keep your head up- for your sake and the others around you.

This past weekend was very bittersweet.  After fighting sickness for years Ryan's grandfather JC was called home.  Even when the family is expecting and waiting on such an event, it doesn't hurt any less once it happens.  We got the call at around 5:00 Friday morning and headed home shortly afterwards for a long weekend of being with family, grieving, and visiting with so many people who really cared about JC and his loved ones.

He lived a good, long life with three children, eight grandchildren, and fourteen great grandchildren.  Emmy will make 15, and I believe that JC is in Heaven telling my granddaddy Steve, grandmother Alice, and Ryan's Papa "Slick" about her and how excited the family is.  Events like this really put things in perspective.  We're just passing through.

Despite the reason we were in town it did brighten our day to have several baby gifts waiting on us at my parents' house.

We were home from early Friday morning until late Monday afternoon, and in all that time almost every single meal was prepared and brought to us.  Everyone came bearing love and food for the family.  I must thank the Lord for calling some people to bring Zaxby's chicken tenders, pound cake, and homemade bread.  

HALLELUJAH!!!

Here I am eyeing each visitor as they arrived and following them into the kitchen.

Ryan has an extremely close family, and although we were together for a somber occasion we still got in some smiles and laughs and enjoyed each others' company.  After all, Ryan and all of his cousins are a product of JC and the good life he was given.  It is, in part, a reason to celebrate- because we know where he is now.  

Ryan was the "baby" grandson, and there is nowhere I would have been but by his side during this time.  I love him with all my heart.

Ryan's Mom surprised us by adding Emerson's ultrasound picture to the family collage (in the bottom right corner).  That was so special to us.  Our little girl is already a huge part of the family.

The funeral service was wonderful, and I believe Ryan's grandfather would have been so pleased with it.  Over the weekend we were talking about how many older people prefer a small affair and not a big to-do when it comes to memorial services, etc.

I, however, have some different ideas about my funeral one day...

Upon arriving each guest will receive a foam finger and set of pom poms with their service programs.  They will then be escorted to the cheering section.

And when the family comes in for the funeral procession those in attendance will be doing the wave.

And you think I'm kidding.

My blog quote for today: "While saying goodbye, do it in style."

With all the events that have been going on- from the stressful to the super- there is one thing that brings me an incredible amount of joy, and that's when I feel my little girl moving around.  And I mean move. There was a three day period when I felt her 24/7.  Does this kid know how to relax and slow down?  Nope.  She's my daughter, alright.

My womb: the city that doesn't sleep.

She has me wondering if she's trying to accomplish the following during these last few weeks until her due date:

1) Training for the 2028 Olympics

2) Doing a ninja routine

3) Practicing pole vaulting

And for the record, several strangers have actually said to me: "Your daughter will be a Daddy's girl only, will love him more, and there's nothing you can do about it."   Who says that, and what first time mother would want to hear such a comment?

On what planet would I not be a lovable and fun parent?

A) I have the palate of a five year old and will certainly relate to her in that regard.

B) Emerson's first words will most likely be "Let's hide these shopping bags from Daddy," "Can we bake cookies and eat all the dough again?", or "Will you watch these five Disney movies with me like you usually do?"

C) I live for board games, Nintendo, and all things sparkly.

The truth is that I've always been both a Mama and Daddy's girl.  It depends on what kind of mood each of them are in!  I know how to work the angles.

So let's just say that Emerson will take after me and will love both of her parents equally.  Thank you kindly.

Speaking of fathers Ryan's Dad also had major back surgery last Tuesday, so please say a prayer for his quick recovery.  He's quite the trooper and is already doing much better.

In other news my parents are in the process of a massive redecorating project with their house, which has resulted in exacerbated Carlson chaos as we move objects from room to room to accommodate the painter.

And you thought looking for lost keys was hard when the house was clean...

Jay and Ryan lounge in our makeshift furniture.

Our phone is ringing off the hook with calls from the producers of Hoarders.

To quote my Yankee father:  "We ahh nevah evah redecorating this house again.  EVAH!"

He is too funny for words.

This Sunday was a special day.  My dear Robert came forward during the service to join the church!  Love him!!!

Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting Kate's sweet son, Gabe, who is just a few days old.  Isn't he a little bundle of precious???

Ask me that again at 3:00 am!

I am over-the-moon happy for Kate and Walt as they enjoy their first precious days with their little guy. I can hardly wait to see him again!

And a special shout out to my brother-in-law whose Birthday is today!!!  We celebrated yesterday with brownies and one of my infamous artistic cards.

Tires, deer antlers, hunting rifles, Swiss rolls, and zzzzs.  The boy loves his sleep.

Kevin, I hope your Birthday is full of cheer, just like you!

Now for the big number: 30!

Can you guess what it represents?

It's the approximate number of working days I have left until maternity leave.

Piece of cake.  I love putting out fires all day!  I'll make it through without wearing a straightjacket or jumping through the nearest window.

It's important to remember that everything in this life- either good or bad- is only temporary.   The most important decisions in your life are: your Salvation, who you will marry, your career path, how you raise your children, and the list goes on.  Once the major things are set, you'll find that the little ones will fall into place.  At least, that is my daily prayer for myself and for you, too.

Life is a puzzle that is never finished.  Granted, I'm probably missing several pieces under a pile of papers or in a shoe, but you get my point.  We are all a work in progress; just don't plateau.  Spiritual growth is one of the most important things this side of Heaven.  Do three things this week to foster spiritual growth.  It will be some of the wisest time spent.

Sending joy, peace, and hope sailing your way!