A Demolition Expedition

And the madness continues. Last weekend my parents and I went to THE NICEST store I have ever seen in my life...behold the incredibly amazing, out-of-this-world phenomenal....GRANITE STORE in Florence!!!

I mean seriously, LOOK at this place. It's like a Kardashian home on steroids.

My DREAM kitchen.

Check out that AMAZINGLY AWESOME pull out spice rack. I would open and close it all day just for fun!

As if the store wasn't nice enough on its own, check out that BATHROOM!

We made it through the trip with only one minor mishap. While looking at cabinet and drawer knobs I inadvertently ripped off part of the display and had to go ask for help. Whoops. I'm sure every security camera in that place was zoned in on me at that point...

Later Saturday afternoon I got to see Lexie before her senior prom!!! I can't believe she is a senior!!! How gorgeous is she??

I also got to see Lauren!!! I just love Lauren, and we've had some FUN times together : D

That evening Meagan, Dustin and I had a delicious dinner at King's, followed by a trip to the movies. It was a little chilly outside, and I wanted a jacket. Meagan searched her car and ended up finding one of DAWSON'S. Miraculously, it fit. Well, sort of. Who am I kidding- it looked like I bought that coat from Baby Gap. I couldn't have zipped it if my life depended on it, but it was warm, and I was thankful to have it...even if it belonged to a five year old!

On Sunday after church I joined the Colemans and Thompsons for a deliciously dainty lunch at the Charcoal Grill.

I was, however, perplexed by this object on the buffet...

I thought some poor crab had lost its legs.

You see the resemblance, too, right?

But no worries, PETA. This object was actually fried corn bread. That was a close one!

This house has been grand central station this week...

On Tuesday I came home for lunch and parked in the garage as usual. I heard a loud pop when I got inside but didn't think anything of it. Perhaps it was an unfortunate mishap between the mail man and the trash truck. In any event, I was hungry and didn't even bother to see what it was.

After I finished lunch I was getting ready to leave when...the garage door wouldn't open. I tried pressing the button no less than 10 times!!! It would only go up four inches and down four inches. Here I was, STUCK in the house, and needing to get back to work. What ever was I going to do?!?

Then it hit me...I could take Ryan's car, since he now has the company truck- Bingo! I left my poor little incarcerated SUV in the garage until further notice. I had never been so happy to drive Ryan's Honda, and it saved the day.

A rescue car reminds me of a time in 9th grade when I was at Karen's house, and both of our parents were out "partying" most likely at a Bible study or educational function. It was getting late, and all of the sudden there was a terrible storm. I'm talking about a winds howling, torrential rain, no power kind of storm.

We were scared to death and managed to call my parents who were home by then. They drove about half a mile to Karen's house, came to the rescue, and picked us up...in our family station wagon. Let me tell you about that car...

I grew to HATE that station wagon with every fiber of my being. In a sea of Ford Expeditions, sports cars, and other normal vehicles, my stomach would turn each and every afternoon when I had to be picked up in that car from Dillon Christian School. I would duck in the floor board upon entering and tell my Dad to, "Go, go, go- QUICKLY!" He shook his head, exasperated. I was so mortified and humiliated over that car with the wooden paneling that one year for Christmas I actually drew a picture of it in flames and gave it to my parents as a gift. I'll let the artwork speak for itself...

Norman Rockwell's estate should not worry about any artistic competition. However, I was grateful for the station wagon that ONE fateful evening during the storm...although I seriously considered walking home and risking my life, getting in the car was clearly the safer option.

And now back to the issue at hand: my garage...it turns out that the spring on the door is completely broken in half and needs to be replaced. I hate spending money on non-fun things. A new outfit and accessories? That's a blast.

An oversized metal spring for the garage door? Not nearly as much fun. You can't wear something like that in public. I take that back, Lady Gaga...

Last week Ryan had HAD it with the yard and the overgrown bushes. He decided to take matters (aka the control sticks) into his own hands...read further at your own risk to find out what happened...

Last weekend he extracted the bushes with some sort of constructional equipment, but the roots were still in tact and needed to be removed as well.

I came home from work one day this week, and here's what I found...

What IS that thing??? An excavator? I felt like I needed a hard hat to even stand in the yard.

And then I thought, "How many opportunities will I have to sit on a piece of construction equipment??"

Need some yard work? Call 1-800-KatharineDisaster. We specialize in destruction.

Annnnnddddd, here it is in action...

I wonder if the folks at Extreme Home Makeover need some extra help demolishing homes...

I may just submit Ryan's resume'/instructional video for the producers' review...

Sometime next week I will have the pleasure of going shrubbery shopping. I'm sure that will make for an interesting blog post.

While I'm waiting for the original Dance Moms to return in June, I have really gotten into the Miami version of this show. Although, all of them have strange accents.

Even the instructor on the left sounds exactly like Ricky Ricardo when he speaks and critiques...

We have become obsessed with discovered our new favorite snack...

These are THE BEST potato chips in the UNIVERSE. We have devoured two bags of them already. You haven't eaten a potato chip until you try one of these. Sorry, Lays, Pringles, and Ruffles... It is what is is.

And did you know that Chick-Fil-A has GRILLED nuggets now?!? What a culinary masterpiece!!! There are only 2 grams of fat in an 8 pack. That's insane!!! It also means that I can eat more Cape Cod waffle chips and not feel as guilty.

Ryan and I had dinner out one night this week, and after waiting what seemed like an extremely long time our waiter informed us that "a new girl had dropped my chicken tenders and." HAHAHA!!! That was just hilarious to me. I wish I had seen this take place.

That was a really strange restaurant outing for a number of reasons.

1) Our waiter whom we had never met said that we hadn't been in in a while and that she had missed us???

2)Some random employee came by our table and asked us if we were looking for Nikki. ??? Who the heck is Nikki??

3)Another random sweet old man came up and told me that I looked just like his granddaughter in law. I never know how to take comments like this, because it leaves me with a great sense of mystery as to what the person they're talking about actually looks like.

Who knows?? It could be...

4) We were 3/4 of the way done with our meal when the waiter said, "I'll be right back with more fries." Huh? I told Ryan that I thought she meant to say tea. Clearly it was a Freudian slip, and the poor girl was hungry. But sure enough, out came a steaming plate of fries. ??? Turns out they were supposed to go to another table and not ours. Totally bizarre.


Yesterday was the great battle of Ryan vs. a wasp.

This wasn't your typical insect; it was red and evidently fuming with anger. Ryan incorporated three different methods into his plan of attack.

Step 1 was the spray can. I later thanked him for spraying that window clean with the bug solution. It's probably the same formula as Windex, right? It just comes in a more sophisticated can in an effort to make the user feel more powerful.

Step two was the broom. That wasp wasn't having it.

Every time Ryan swatted, the little guy would buzz around frantically, sending Ryan into a frenzy. It was quite comical actually. I could have almost gotten some popcorn and a soda as I watched it all unfold.

The third and final attempt was with a mop. The wasp actually got stuck to it and eventually (get this) flew out of the front door as if nothing had happened!!! He was seriously immortal. If I had been sprayed, saturated, poked, prodded, smashed, etc... I definitely wouldn't be FLYING anywhere.

I'm FREEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just remember, wasp. Ryan has his eyes on you.

And now for a complete change of subject. My church has been having discussions on this book, and it highly intrigued me. I went to Books a Million this week in hopes that they would have a copy. Wouldn't you know that I got the last possible copy?

This is a fantastic and extremely interesting book. Lately I have been burdened with and have been researching how to pray for the lost. Witnessing is, of course, key, but through my research I have found that if everyone on earth had a clear understanding of what it meant to be saved then there is absolutely NO POSSIBLE WAY that they would choose not to accept Jesus and spend an eternity in complete darkness and excruciating agony. Although we as humans have free will, I can pray that the lost will be freed of any and every misunderstanding they have about Christianity, other religions, the Bible, Jesus, and salvation. I can pray that they will have a clear understanding of salvation and how desperately they need it. People ask me all the time about other religions and what makes them "wrong." Erwin Lutzer brings attention to the fact that Satan is a great deceptor. Of course he would want people to believe that other religions are right by portraying an angel of light. How wonderful it would be if everyone could just see and understand Christianity without any doubt. That is my prayer.

"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." John 14:6

I am having a WONDERFUL month. Everything is going so well in every aspect of my life. It's easy to reach out to God when we need things, but remember to thank Him for His blessings when things are going splendidly.

I hope you have a FANTASTIC weekend!!!

Peace, love, shrubs,

Out "Spokin"

I was at the gym late last Friday afternoon when I got a call from my grandmother. My grandfather had a minor eye surgery that day, and the doctor was concerned about his heart rate after the procedure. The Emergency Room at Providence Hospital was immediately notified, and he was taken back right away.

Talk about SCARY! Thankfully Nanny was in good spirits when I talked to her, and after staying in the hospital for two days Papa was discharged with some medication to regulate his heart beat. Only he would be whistling Chopin tunes while hooked up to IVs in his hospital bed. He was the most popular guy on the floor and was also told that he is one of the healthiest 82 year olds they've ever seen. Praise the Lord!

I mean really, you’ve just gotta love this guy:

I visited him both days and am SO thankful that he is okay. And get this- his room was BESIDE the room where my Dad was after his triple bypass surgery. That's two immense blessings I have received from the 6th floor of Providence hospital.

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On Sunday afternoon Megan and I went to see Titanic in 3D!!! I was honored to be in attendance for her first ever 3D movie, glasses and all. This movie brought back so many memories. In 7th grade I was OBSESSED with the Titanic. I drew pictures of the boat during class (probably during math, if I had to guess, which I hated) and even talked my Dad into buying me a large coffee table book on the making of the movie during a trip to Books-a-Million.

One cold night in 1997 the Carlsons and Joneses took a trip to Florence to see this beloved movie. It is no surprise to me that my parents had no idea the movie would be three hours long, resulting in me getting little to no sleep the night before some gifted and talented SAT test. The uninformed Carlsons; so typical. Plus, the movie theater was so crowded that we all got separated, and Brittni, Jay, and I had to sit on the very front row.

Anyway, I was enthralled by everything that had to do with this movie and the story behind it.

Fun fact: Did you know that Gwyneth Paltrow was almost cast as Rose? That would definitely have been a change!

Did you know that there are websites with information on almost all of the passengers? You can read all about the people, both commoners and very influential guests, who were aboard. It is absolutely fascinating.

"God Himself couldn't sink this ship," huh?

To this day I am still TOTALLY fascinated by all things Titanic. Last week at my Uncle’s I read the latest National Geographic magazine with all new photos of the wreckage.

And for the record, I personally don’t understand the pressure that was put on the captain to speed up and arrive at the destination early. In all seriousness if I had paid for a cruise I wouldn’t WANT to arrive early and spend less time on the luxurious ship. I paid for x number of nights on the boat, and that’s how many I expect to be there. I know that they wanted to make headlines, but seriously? I think the ship itself was enough of a headline. What a tragedy.

You can also go to youtube and see interviews from the survivors. One lady’s story in particular stood out. She was seven when she boarded the Titanic and said that the worst silence she ever heard was when cries and screams stopped from the people who were drowning and freezing to death in the water. Chilling.

This is just further proof that earthly things don't matter. Hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of valuables were lost at sea that night. When you stand before Jesus one day He won't ask if you were in first, second, or third class. He'll want you to have been a follower of His while on earth. Let this serve as a reminder.

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My latest adventure took place this week........I in my infinite wisdom decided to take a spin class.

I arrived about 15 minutes early, and there was only one other guy in the room. I thought, “Wow! I can’t believe I was lucky enough to get a bike without having to wait in line!” I would soon find out why.

As the minutes passed more brave souls began trickling in, and I got on my bike. My first quandary was the many adjustments I needed to make in order to reach the pedals with proper form; the previous rider must have been 6’5. I was turning and rotating all kinds of knobs and at one point locked the bike wheel completely so that it wouldn’t turn at all. Oops. A kind classmate helped fix this conundrum.

Then there was the seat…

With each excruciating turn of the pedals I kept adjusting from side to side in an immense effort to get comfortable. By far and without a shadow of a doubt, that had to be the worst, most uncomfortable seat EVER.

I tried to think about something that would be MORE comfortable than that awful excuse for a cushion.

A few things came to mind:

During the first two minutes I lost feeling in my legs. Then the instructor proceeded to say, “Alright folks, we’re almost done with the warm-up. Then we’ll really get started.” YOU MEAN WE HAVEN'T "STARTED" YET?!?

I absolutely felt like Lucille Ball in that class. I was pedaling so frantically I thought my legs were going to fly off at any moment. What's worse, each time I looked at the clock only one or two minutes had passed.

By the end of the hour I felt like this (in bicycle terms):

But I made it!!! And I am very "out-spokin" (to quote a store in Columbia) about my experience. So what was Ryan up to during my "bicicular" adventure?

He was busy doing one of the things he does best:

Washing and folding clothes! Seriously, you would think he grew up in a military academy. Every item he touches is perfectly folded and put away.

There were many nights in high school when Ryan would have to get off the phone and go fold clothes. My mother was smitten to hear this and in 10th grade told me, "Ok, you can marry him now."

I, however, take a Stop, Drop, & Roll approach with clothing.

What is that, exactly?

The dryer stops, I drop all the clothes in a pile, roll each item into some sort of shape, and then put them away.

Hey, I consider it a success if I can actually finish a load of clothes without this happening...

I mean well, but I sometimes miss hearing or forget pertinent information during instructions. Anyone who knows me well can attest to this. If nothing else, it makes for great stories...like when Ryan was bringing me breakfast one morning and asked me to make some coffee before he returned. I don't drink coffee (yuck!), so I listened carefully (or so I thought) to each of Ryan's instructions:

Get a new filter, pour one scoop of coffee into it, and then add water. I somehow missed the part when Ryan told me to pour the water in the back of the coffee maker, so I did what I thought made sense. If the coffee beans have to mix with the water, then you should pour water into the filter, right?

Wrong. I was cleaning up grains for a week, and oddly enough, Ryan has never asked me to make coffee again.

We all make honest mistakes, right??? I certainly have. A few that come to my mind are including but not limited to...

1) The time I thought a "self-cleaning oven" had a built in dishwasher that sprayed water inside. I wondered where to put the soap.

2) The time I thought that items from the "Oops Overbaked" section in grocery stores meant that the food had been burned...

I could never understand why my Dad insisted on buying overcooked bread and rolls. Sure they were on sale and all, but really? Imagine my surprise when I found out that "overbaked" in fact meant quantity.

3) Or the time I met a girl from Pomaria and said, "Welcome to America! I'm honored to meet a Pomeranian."

When in fact a Pomeranian is a...

What is the correct term for people who live in Pomaria, anyway?


And in other news, I and this little invention became great friends this week:

This is a rice cooker. It cooks rice PERFECTLY, every time! It's unbelievable really. I should have thought of it myself.

One of my "stand-out" meals this week was stir fry. So what if the vegetables and beef came from the frozen section in Bi-Lo. The thought is in the preparation.

I have been a busy little bee at work.

And this little bug needs some RELAXATION!

Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.

Have a WONDERFUL Friday and weekend, my friends!!!